Depression Sucks – But Help Is Here!
We have many thoughts per day. Many people around the world are having the thought “depression sucks” right now or at least at some point during their day. “Depression sucks” and its variations is a very common thought. Depression is on the rise.
There’s no question about it, if you have depression it can be a constant struggle to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Every morning when you wake up your first thought while you lie awake in bed is probably “depression sucks”, which means that you are already labelling the state/condition as depression. Alternatively, the thought you become aware of may be a milder general form of dissatisfaction with something (or several things) expressed as “life sucks”. Many people are not aware of having depression; they are just aware that they hate life or feel different negative emotions very often or have suicidal thoughts or have some other depression symptoms. The majority of depressed people keeps it as a secret at least as long as possible.
Sometimes it can feel as though every day you are stuck in Groundhog Day repeating the same thoughts and actions over and over again like you’re on a hamster wheel. Depression has a way of stripping the colour from things you do so that instead of being bright and full of joy and new things to discover, the days become a haze of grey toned monotony that you can’t wait to escape from. I think you agree that if that is what depression is like, then depression sucks, a lot.
The most important thing to do if you are struggling with depression is to continue seeing your therapist. Or, if you are feeling depressed but have not been officially diagnosed, go to see a therapist to get their professional opinion. If you find it difficult to find and meet a local therapist, you may consider using online therapy to find a certified professional to talk to – it may be faster and more cost-effective. Following that, here are five things you should take into account to bring you back to a more positive state of mind (depression sucks no more, it doesn’t exist in your new future which you can start creating now step by step):
1. Don’t Dwell On The Past
It has been said that depression lives in the past and anxiety lives in the future. While it is important to reflect back on your actions of the past, you must make sure that this is not where you spend most of your time.
When you ruminate on the past you cannot focus on the present. You may feel the days slipping away from you as you are not ever fully present. This can lead to heightened feelings of depression whereby you feel as though you have no control over your life. It’s important to remember that our lives consist of the moments we have day to day. Dwelling on the past only robs you of this ever important present.
While it can be tempting to reason that because something happened in the past we cannot move forward, the opposite is actually true. The past brings us lessons to learn from so that we can move forward. Our mistakes, hurt, and failures from the past teach us valuable life skills that, if we allow them to, will teach us how to move forward in the best way possible.
2. Don’t Catastrophize
Catastrophizing is an irrational thought pattern that is characterised by believing something is going to turn out in the worst possible way. Catastrophizing can occur in relation to a current situation that is taking place or imagining a future situation.
Examples of catastrophizing in the present include believing that no one will turn up to the party that you have planned as you wait for guests to arrive. Catastrophizing in the future can take the form of more general statements such as believing your life will never work out the way you want it to. Both kinds of catastrophizing lead you to feel self-pity and eat away at your sense of worth. At its worst catastrophizing can lead to avoiding opportunities because you may believe that you will never succeed anyway.
The first step to stopping yourself from catastrophizing is to learn to take things for what they are. Because you made one mistake does not mean you only ever make mistakes. Having setbacks is something that everyone deals with in life. Once you realise that not everyone is perfect, you can begin to accept your mistakes for what they are – part of being human.
3. Reach Out To Friends And Family
When you have depression, it can be hard to muster up the effort to stay in touch with your friends and family. You may also have a hard time feeling emotions and it can be difficult to feel close to anyone. It may also feel as though you are a burden to them, and that they would be better off without you.
The first and most important step you must take is to let your loved ones know about your depression. Even if you tell one or two trusted friends or family members, this is still a great step in the right direction. It can be difficult and scary to admit to others that you may be struggling to cope, however once you get past this barrier you will be glad that you did.
Telling your friends and family about your depression serves two purposes. Firstly, you now have opened up communication and when you are struggling you can let them know without having to make up excuses or avoid conversation. Secondly, if you have not been in touch for a while your loved ones can check up on you coming from a place of love and care, rather than being confused as to why you have seemed to have disappeared or seem disinterested in hanging out.
4. Keep Up With Your Self-Care
Self-care consists of anything we do that is good for us and makes us feel positive. At its most basic level self-care consists of taking care of your daily living needs such as eating properly, sleeping well, and grooming. Much like communicating with friends or family, keeping up with your self-care can be an arduous task when you have depression.
When you’re feeling down it’s important to try to remember how you feel after you complete an activity that is good for you. If you keep this thought it the back of your mind it can be easier to do things that are good for you.
In addition to your basic needs mentioned above, self-care can look different for different people. For some it may mean reading a good book or listening to some music, for others it could be having a pamper day at home and using a face mask. Activities like this make you enjoy the day to day and bring positivity into your life. If self-care is something you struggle with, start small. Aim for goals such as getting out of bed by a certain time, showering, and getting some sunlight or fresh air. It may seem small but doing these things consistently leads to a habit, which gives you a sense of accomplishment, and can spur you on to keep going.
5. Celebrate Small Wins
It is important to recognise when you have accomplished something, no matter how small it may seem. Just because something may seem simple, this does not mean that it is easy. When you feel as though you have no energy, getting out of bed in the morning should be something you are proud of. It’s important that you recognise when to push yourself that little bit further, and when to simply stop and appreciate what you have achieved for the day.
One great thing that you can keep in mind to celebrate your wins is journaling. You could try a more traditional form of journaling where you put down all your thoughts on paper or try recording only your successes. This can be a great way to round out the end of your day. Before you go to bed, you could write down three things that you’ve completed or things you are grateful for today. When you are feeling down, having these wins written down somewhere you can easily see them is a great reminder that things can, and will improve again.
Final Word
If you have already tried many therapies, and are looking for a new or an additional complementary approach – please take a look at “40 therapies for depression” and read the free e-book: Quest for a depression-free life.
Depression is not just about mental hygiene and the quality of your thoughts. When you stop thinking “depression sucks”, ideally it happens because the root causes of your depression have been resolved.
You might need and benefit from certain dietary changes including some detox (removing toxins, waste from the body), and certain healing modalities with the focus on releasing stored/trapped emotions (emotion – energy in motion, stored/trapped as a limiting contraction).
We can often read or hear that we are body-mind-spirit. In some cases, you might have to examine the “spirit” component more in depth – for example in the form of past life regression therapy. For a better understanding of a holistic approach and available possibilities, we advise to educate yourself further by reading our book about depression available as free download as a pdf file.
Even if depression sucks, and it is just a huge understatement, never give up your personal quest to find approaches and solutions, which will help you to heal from depression.
Continue your unique path to achieve greater health (physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual), and live life in good mood, and find meaningful and joyful activities in life.